Just trying to get by.

Hey Folks,

My twins will turn 17 on Saturday, and I will tell you that really got me thinking. I feel a little like George Bailey. Because I can't help but think, Vinny you have had a wonderful life. I don't want it to end any time soon but I can't help of think of how happy and wonderful it has been. And this also got me reminiscing about how different my path to 17 was than my kid’s path. I did not have a hard upbringing, but then it was not easy either. I have two sisters and a brother but they are 10yrs plus older than me. So it was kind of like growing up an only child. My parents were depression era folks. And hearing their stories, I want no part of a depression. And their lives were so hard, they had a hard time expressing there feelings. So I think that’s why I say I love you to my wife and kids every chance I can. And I think that’s way I am so much closer to my kids than my parents ever were to me or my siblings. My mother was a very tough Irish woman who I would call more street smart than book smart. She never wanted me to be soft. And she never held her tongue to spare my feelings. If she was in a bad mood, AKA (Hungover). She would let you know. "Mom what’s for dinner? "SH*T". Ahh, bowl of cereal. "Mom what are you cooking?" "Crap". Ahh, another rasin bran night." Mom can you give me a ride downtown? "The Buses on strike." Looks like I’m walking. Now fast forward my my home now. "Mom whats for supper?" "What do you want me to make you hunny?." "Mom what are you cooking?" What you asked me to make last week, sweetheart? “Mom can you give me and my friends a ride to the mall. Sure, do you need any money?" Now my father was not much better. He was a old school Italian. He was not very vocal until you got him mad. I'm not sure what I did, and I'm sure I deserved a good whack, but my father beat me so bad one time my brother had to pull him off me before he killed me. My house now, a lot of threats no hitting. Now that I have painted my parents in a bad light, I have to say for the most part they were good parents. Just not the type of parents you see now a days. My tough Irish mother who never threw me a kind word, when I told here I wanted to join the Boy Scouts went out and bought me every possible Boy Scout accessory. And my non verbal father would do just about anything I asked to make me happy. My parents were from a different time. A depression era, drinking era, smoking era, world warII, Koren war, Vietnam war, time. These are the same folks that instilled in me that its family first. Take care of the less fortunate and walk a mile in someone else’s shoes before you judge them. As I sit here and write this I can't believe how much I miss them. They both passed a few years ago. And I always think when times are hard. My parents made it through much harder times. And what my father use to always say when there was lull in the conversation or when he was just lost for words. "Better days are coming or Keep the faith." It took me 47 years to learn but my parents were just trying to get by. Just like me an wife are now. So If you are lucky enough to still have your parents, they may not be perfect but they are just trying to get by. Just like you.

See ya

Vinny

Part Time jobs, Girls and stolen cars.

Hey folks,

I have been trying to get my kids to get part time jobs. But its tough in this recession, which got me to thinking about my part time jobs. I've had a few, but the most fun and most memorable was parking cars at the Harbour House in Lynn. Now this was a hotel/nightclub. And it was only a hotel in that it did have rooms to rent. But that’s were the comparison ends. The word "SEEDY" comes to mind. This was a great part time job for me. No heavy lifting, no real lifting at all. Stand in a parting lot for 7 - 8 hours making sure no one parks in the Hotel Guest lot. And keep the flow of traffic going. I was not suppose to let anyone park in the hotel guest lot unless you were a guest, well unless you "tip" me. Then you were a guest of Vin. Everyone always told me that this place was run by the mob. I never knew for sure but there were things that did point in that direction. Like one night my buddy Dan was harassed and roughed up be a patron of the night club. And the word got around what had happed the night before. And the next night the bouncer "Big Lenny" gave Dan and I both blackjacks. And told us, "If anyone messes wiff youes tonight. One wack on the head, they will go down like a sack of potatoes. Then roll them under a car and I will take care of the rest." No ever really bother us after that. But I was ready with my blackjack, like Barney Fife with his one bullet in is shirt pocket. Did I just show my age? Younger kids see Andy Griffin show. This was a great place to work if only for the all the bands that came. I got to meet most of them. Most were local like "The Stompers, Robin lane and the chartbusters, Luna, The Fools." And this made me a very popular in my high school. Because, I had it going on back then. Not really. I just thought I did, like most high school kids. When I think of myself now and then, I always use a quote by Lenny Clark. "I might not be the best looking guy, but I'm not hurting the national average either." The parking lot was huge. And on nights with good band you might have to park a quarter mile away next to the water. And it was not uncommon for a young lady to ask me to walk her to her car. One night this one girl asked me to walk her to her car by the water. We get to the car and she says her girl friends will be coming out soon and she will give me a ride back the front door. I don't know if it was because I was seventeen or because I was dumb as a bag full of bricks. So we get in and she grabs me. And it was right then I was a 17 year old boy and a 17 year old man. Because, I had the same thought at the same second. First the boy. "Hey she’s touching me were she should not be!!!!" and at the same second as the man "Hey she’s touching me were she should not be!!!" Guess which side of me won out. Well I’m not gonna kiss and tell, well at least not in my Blog. See me later. But that was the best tip I ever got.

For the most part I just worked there but every once in a while I would take a girl out to a show there. When I remember going there with a girl I see it my head like when Henry Hill takes his future wife out to the night club in Good Fellas. People giving me the best table, free drinks and food and everyone knows me. But in reality I think I just got in for half price. Working in a parking lot you help a lot of people break into their cars. Most for locking their keys in there. So one night these two very cute girls all made up with tight jeans come over to me and say they have locked their keys in their Cadillac. Now with that other time I helped a young lady fresh in my mind I could not get the door open fast enough. But this time all I got was a 2 dollar tip. And about 30 minutes later a middle age man comes out and says "Did you see my silver Caddy, it was parked right here!" Well, GULP. I looked him straight in the eye and said, "No sir, but then I just got here. I bet it got towed." I learned a lot from that job. But the one thing I took from it is. When you just helped 2 hotties steal a guys car, who may or may not be in the mob. LIE.

Se ya

Vinny

You can't pick your family

Hey Folks,

You know I seem to be always fighting with my wife or kids. But when I think about it its not fighting at all, its communicating. And it’s more bickering. Or should I say it’s my form of communicating. It was taught to me by my parents. Because we were never really angry at each other. When I first started dating my wife Karen she would come over and she was horrified at the way we talked to each other. My father would yell, I would yell, my mother would yell. And I would storm off in a huff. Then later I would say to her lets go back to my house. And she would say I don't think they want you around, and I would laugh. And she was shocked that when I walked back in the house (most times) there were no hard feelings and all was forgotten. But you have to understand this is the way we communicated. And I thought this is the way everyone got along. I learned a lot when I moved out years later, like meat was very good, and was moist and not dry like served in my house. But only years later did I learn that my fathers yelling, like mine came from a place of worry and fear. A few years ago my son was over weight and his cholesterol was through the roof. And we had to take him to children’s hospital for a check up. And that day I was a bear. Yelling and complain about everything. I told my wife weeks later that this was fear that something was really wrong with this kid that I loved more than anything. She said "Vin, I know". “You only have two moods angry worried guy or happy funny guy.” Now while I think I am a little more complex than that, she is basically correct.

Family in general are all dysfunctional. But they make all the hard times bearable and the good times brighter. Now when I was young I did not realize any of this. I just looked at my family as one big pain in my butt. I remember a time I had just gotten my drivers license. My uncle Anthony had passed and I was asked to drive my two aunts to the airport to pick up my uncle john who was coming up for the funeral. Now being sixteen or so I cared nothing about any of that. But what I did care about was I was going to get to drive my aunt Jenny's new Oldsmobile to and from the airport. That was a win for old Vin. But little did I realize that the real win was spending time with these two old ladies’. We get to the airport and we go to the gate that my uncle John is coming in on and I read on the monitor he will be coming in on a new gate. So I tell the two lady’s in tow to follow me to the new gate. Well once again the monitor tells me to go do a new gate. This goes on for atleast two more gates when my aunt Suzy all 4' 2" of her, looks at her sister Jenny and says loudly "WHERE THE FU*K IS HE GETTTING HIS INFORMATION!" Well I laughed so hard I actually fell on the floor laughing. When Sen. Paul Tsongas is getting off the plane steps over me and my aunts both great him with a "Hello Senator." He might have walked around me but I think stepped over sounds better.

Now years later I don't remember how that car drove or even the smell. But I do remember the felling when my aunt yelled that out. Just like I know how I feel today when I look at my tall, healthy, smart son. Wonderful!

See ya,

Vinny